i love you unconditionally (under one condition)

cristina carlino

Unpublished Work © 2011 Cristina Carlino

that i can forgive you.  oh!  that condition!  can we do that?  can we really forgive others unconditionally, other than our  children and our grandchildren for whom that seems to come to as a gift of  nature?  i’m sure the native american indians got it right when they taught  every living thing from a rock to the earth to a person deserves our love and reverence and forgiveness and that makes such simple sense until someone throws a rock at your back, or breaks your heart in two.  then, under these and a zillion other scenarios, the road to unconditional love via forgiveness can get pretty bumpy.

but the older i become, the more i want to try to stay on it a little bit more daily… i want to love unconditionally and  it helps that dream seem less daunting when i consider what unconditional forgiveness even means:

it does not mean i approve of what was done

it doesn’t mean i have to forget

forgiveness means i forget  about expecting you to change the past

i forget about holding you hostage for it,

so join me on this sacred dirt road and see if any of these lookout points open a new vista. do any of these reasons to forgive someone who you truly want to love resonate with you?

i forgive you for:

taking me to a “romantic valentine’s dinner” at a place that played rap.

leaving your dirty socks on the floor.  again.

not doing it the way i would do it.

giving me advice i didn’t ask for.

being smarter, prettier, richer or funnier than i am.

not being able to make me happy

talking about me behind my back

not being who i told others you would be.

i forgive you for  embarrassing me

i forgive you for not showing up on time

for what you said to me when i was a child

for what you didn’t say

i forgive you for not being healthy.

i forgive you for not choosing me

i forgive you for choosing me for what I never wanted to be chosen for

i forgive you for laying me off my job

i forgive you for reminding me of my mother, father, sister, teacher

i forgive you for being black, white, male, female, foreign or furry.  (fill in the blank)

so i pray for a forgiving heart so that i may love you unconditionally.  and under one final condition:

that i can forgive myself first.  because if i have no forgiveness for me i really have none to offer you.

it’s not an easy journey but it’s so worth it.  the road itself is very forgiving.  nothing but love.  it’s not a project.  it’s a process.  a little bit more each day.  it may well be what heals us and our world.

peace and blessings,

cristina

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4 responses to “i love you unconditionally (under one condition)

  1. WOW, what a powerful writing! I wish some of the people, who are gone now, deep-down-in-my-heart, I would have forgiven. It does, however, make me want to work on the unconditional loving I know I can do. Perhaps that is the first step — wanting to try to work on it…and then doing it!

  2. Pingback: Tweets that mention i love you unconditionally (under one condition) | Project Miracle -- Topsy.com

  3. Beautifully written. Thank you so much. I divorced an alcoholic and have such a hard time with forgiveness. Your line about forgiving someone for “not being healthy” resonated deeply.

  4. you teach me new ways to love myself and others each time i read.
    Forgiveness is everything. Thank you for your special thoughts.

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